The Beau Kind

Dear Reader(s?),

I just wanted to let you (both) know that I’m still around.  I’ve registered a new domain so I will happily be moving soon.  And just in time for me to have the time to write more regularly over the summer!

I’ve got LOTS of new stuff to tell you

I’ll keep you posted when I know the timeline a bit better, but the new site will be named…

Wait for it…

80ish.com

I’ve decided to look for a new pseudonym also.  I have a few ideas, but nothing’s really jumped off the page for me yet.  I’m really going to be glad to move into the new digs.  (The site’s not active yet.)

See you soon,

Beau

Bonus Pic (Entitled Vixen…without explanation…yet.)

I’m going to be changing my web address within the next couple of months.  There are some changes planned for the site (in both look and organization).  So Stay Tuned…

I’ll be looking for a new name soon.  If anyone has any suggestions in that direction, please send them to me by email–I don’t want names that I’m considering to appear on the site before I go to request them.

Maybe we could have a contest in the comments for the WORST website address for me???

Bonus Link

Have you ever heard someone say, “What’s good for the goose is good for the gander.” when they placed themselves in the position of “goose?”

Bonus Link I

Bonus Link II

Why is it that people are reluctant to admit their advantages in life?

Wealthy or beautiful people regularly downplay the fact that their advantages have aided them to succeed. Why don’t we tell our kids (as a rule) that it’s OK not to have overcome huge obstacles?

A few examples:

• Suburban kids rejecting their wealth by (ostensibly) adopting the poverty-stricken inner-city culture. (These kids could be white or black—for a very disturbing take on this, see the 1999 movie “Whiteboyz.”)
• Suburban kids rejecting their wealth by (ostensibly—and sometimes genuinely) adopting the poverty-stricken culture associated with punk music.
• The entire “Goth” movement.
• EVERY person I went to high school with, all of whom now tell me that they were a “total nerd back then.” Really? Then why do I remember you being a cheerleader who fucked the basketball team?

I talked with a student recently who was in the third category. She is in her mid teens and is trying very hard to show that she hasn’t had all the advantages of suburban life with wealthy parents. I’ve been thinking that she needs to be told that life is hard enough for people with advantages, and that she need not think that her advantages mean that her accomplishments aren’t meritorious. She’s a good young woman and I think this one idea is holding her back from reaching her true potential. …But is this idea the chicken or the egg?…

That’s an awkward conversation to have with a teen and I don’t remember anyone giving it to me. (Although it might be inherent in the teen-mind’s architecture that this conversation can’t be heard–consequently, I wouldn’t be able to remember it.) Now that I’ve put my finger on the exact problem (or so I think), I’m going to try to have that conversation with her as soon as I can gracefully work it into our conversation—we’ll see what happens. Probably nothing.

Travel is an important part of the answer to this problem. Travel to the third-world. When people–I’m my first example of the efficacy of this plan–see the TRUE difficulty of living in abject poverty, they begin to learn some perspective on their own place in the world. One high school in one wealthy country is too small a sample to allow us to draw useful concepts of our place in the world. Maybe we know this on some level and that’s why we amplify the small differences within our limited sample?

Obama’s plan to increase involvement in the Peace Corps and similar programs is a big step in the right direction for this country. It gives young people an opportunity:

• to do something truly difficult
• to see how most of the world lives (and how we don’t)
• to have a sense of making the world a better place
• to have a connection with the world’s culture
• to open their minds in ways they’ve never imagined.

A friend of mine was a Peace Corps volunteer and the stories that she’s told me suggest all of the benefits listed above. The Peace Corps wasn’t run as well as it could have been, and we need to make sure that these kind people are kept a bit more securely than her stories suggest that they are kept, but overall I hope more kids take advantage of this before going straight through school and into the job market. We’ll be a better country if this happens.

There was kind of a theme to this post…

Bonus Link I

Check out this quote from the comments:

rule 1. You can’t be gangsta in a purple room. rule 2. You CAN’T be gangsta and wear purple and pink that’s very not gangsta. rule 3. you can’t be gangsta and have a man crush (see 20 2 pac posters) YOU ARE NOT GANGSTA

Bonus Link II

I’m going to have to try that first one.  Do you think it would work for me?

I:

1. now consider myself, after one painful day, a snowboarder. Not a good one, but one.
2. frequently do things that are stupid: like driving (last week) from Utah to Yellowstone only to find that Yellowstone closes during the winter. Yes, I wasted about 15 hours, but it was a beautiful drive
3. (in the same category as the previous entry) have missed two or three flights over the past couple of years because I confused the time or day and haven’t yet learned to check on these things ahead of time.
4. am going to be traveling all summer again! Possible trips include: D.C., Argentina, Japan, Canada, Hungary, and the Northeast (most of the states on my not-yet-visited list are located there.)
5. practice Yoga regularly now. It’s like martial arts, but without the bruises and headaches. Bonus.
6. was recently told by Keiko (who was laughing about this) that I “am weird EVEN to Americans.” She clearly felt vindicated by the knowledge that she was no longer alone.
7. have been sick for the past four days with strep throat. The Nurse Practitioner (who was VERY cool) told me that Schnuck’s gives out free penicillin. How? Why? Interesting.
8. am still searching for who I am/what I want after Thistle’s death.
9. am now more than two years into my widowerhood.
10. have been stretching my musical skills to include non-percussion instruments—like my voice! I’m having a lot of fun with this and feel that it makes me a more rounded musician. Anyone ever heard of a Primus tune called “Tommy the Cat?” I’m thinking of including a solo version of it on an upcoming concert.
11. LOVE ice cream. Especially if it’s generously covered with peanut butter, chocolate sauce, and brown sugar. Maybe not surprisingly, I don’t really care what the underlying flavor of the ice cream itself is.
12. used to have asthma, but four or five years ago, it just faded away. Lucky Beau.
13. have seen Watchmen twice. Two years ago, I’m sure that I would have connected strongly with Nite Owl II, but I’m surprised to realize that my favorite character now was (by far) Rorschach.
14. have blog posts planned relating to Racism, Atheism, and a new Interview column. Anyone interested in being interviewed?
15. have joined a hillbilly (music) group.
16. no longer have a cable TV subscription. The only TV that I watch any more is a-season-at-a-time on DVD. I just didn’t watch it often enough to warrant the monthly bill—but I promise not to try to recruit you to get rid of your subscription.
17. need to get this blog back to my original plan—essays about important things.
18. was told recently by both my Father and Brother that they have been using the same disposable razor for years. YEARS! (Not the same brand, but the same single razor!) If I’m shaving regularly, those things don’t even last for weeks for me before they are ripping my face apart. My Dad’s beard is at least as coarse as mine is. I need to learn more about this topic before I can write about it.
19. am relieved to have finished this five-part meme. Thanks again to Ms. Kitty who gave me the idea by writing one on her blog (Although, she only took one day to do it.).
20. have decided not to get a cat.

Bonus Link

So, Why hasn’t Beau been writing for the past half year or so?  There are a few answers to this question:

1. Keiko is (understandably, but unfortunately) not a fan of sharing her private life with a bunch of “weird sex people.”
2. Thistle’s death anniversary–along with the loss of the closest friendship of my life, as well as breaking the ties with three other people who were important to me-put me into a depression that required some time to rectify.  For various (fairly obvious) reasons, this blog wasn’t the appropriate venue for working through those problems.
3. I am basically a disorganized person and writing a blog regularly takes a kind of anal-retentive personality that I don’t have.

So, Why is Beau back?

1. Keiko and I have broken up.  We still see each other regularly, and she is a wonderful woman, but I’m not sure what my needs are at the moment.  This might be one of the bigger mistakes of my life, but I need to take some time for myself.
2. Time has helped with the Thistle part of #2.  As for Diddle, he and I had a good talk about everything and I now realize that there was some miscommunication between us-a small part of which was my fault.  I still miss the Kiddo and there won’t be a resolution to that issue.  One of the results of my talk with Diddle was that I was thinking of trying to reconcile my friendship with TBK, but after thinking it through, I’ve come to realize that she is not a healthy influence on my life.  Belle and I have hung out a few times, but it’s uncomfortable and not fun for either of us.  It’s amazing to me that (eight months ago) these were the four most important people in my life.  Even more surprising to me is that I’ve accepted this and have taken large steps toward filling the gaps that have been left.  Depression, anger, and hatred are dissonant with my core personality and I’ve recently made a lot of progress in leaving these emotions behind.  Good luck to them all, but their paths have diverged from mine.
3. There’s little I can do about #3 above.  Dry spells like this will likely happen again-although they shouldn’t last so long.

My recent dating history has been like this:  Thistle (cancer, etc.), TBK (a modern hippy in an unfortunate job), Belle (a student), and Keiko (a sweet international visitor-in a (financially) unfortunate job).  The parenthetical comments are to show something that these four women have in common-which I hadn’t thought about before-that they are/were all in positions of dependency to me.  Now, I am a caregiver by nature, but I’m starting to think that I need to experience a relationship where the two sides are more balanced.  Maybe I won’t like it.  Maybe I will wish for Keiko to return.  Maybe something will happen that I can’t predict at all right now.  ???

Time will tell.  Maybe that should be the new tagline for this blog?

All I know right now is that I’m starting to get ideas for the blog again.  (And not all of them will be about me!)  So I’ll be back here much more regularly.

Bonus Link.  Check out the picture–these ladies obviously don’t fall as much as I did two days ago!

Double Clicking a Word.

These first three tips will work in just about ANY software that has words.  Double Click on any word to select the entire word without tediously clicking exactly on the beginning of the word, then dragging to exactly the end of the word.  If you Double Click, then drag along the sentence, the program will select the entire first word, then add complete words in the direction that your are dragging.  Change directions and drag back towards your starting point if you want to select portions of the word (or punctuation) at the end of your selection.

Triple Clicking a Word.

…will select the entire paragraph.  (Sometimes this just looks like selecting a single line–it depends upon where the carriage returns were placed by the author.)

Adding the Control Key to Basic Functions.

Adding the Control Key to Backspace, Delete, and the Arrow Keys will change the amount affected to words instead of spaces.  For instance, Control + Backspace will delete the entire previous word (rather than just a single space).  Control + Delete will delete the entire next word.

iTunes:  Changing the information for multiple files.

Some files don’t have the complete album information included for indexing in iTunes.  I’ve been clicking one track at a time and copy/pasting composer names (for example).  I got tired of that today and looked up the way to do an entire album’s composer at one time.  Here it is:  Select all the files you want to change.  (Use Shift + Click for files next to each other, and Control + Click to add files that aren’t next to the first one.  Of course Control + A will “Select All.”)  Once you have the files selected, click Control + I (or Get Info in the File Menu).  Now you can change any of the information for all of the selected files in one batch.

If anyone enjoys these shortcuts, I’ll do a series of them.  I’d also be glad to take requests.  If there’s something you want to be able to do in a common Application, I’ll be glad to do some research and present the findings here for our readers.

Bonus Link

This is a recipe that I promised some time back.  It’s a snack and it only take a few minutes to make.

Ingredients:

Orange Tang

Granny Smith Apples

Procedures:

Take small tea glasses and fill them about 1/3 of the way with Tang powder.  Use boiling water to make a hot (and very concentrated) orange drink.

Eat a bite from the apple slice, then sip the Tang while the apple is still in your mouth.  You’re trying to experience the sweetness of the drink being mixed with the natural tartness of these apples.

This is now a Keiko-approved recipe.

Bonus Link

I woke up to a wonderful surprise this morning.  No, it’s not what you think.

…Actually that’s true too, but that’s not what I’m talking about right now…

The surprise was that I showed up in two consecutive days of blog posts on NewWorld’s site.  Yesterday, she started a series of posts that were inspired by an email that I sent her, and today she tagged me.  I really do enjoy her site, so I thought I’d respond to her meme quickly.  I’m not going to tag anyone else, but I’d be very interested to read the answers of any readers who do take the meme.

1. What are 5 Things you were doing Ten years ago?
My wife was about one year into her Brain Tumor at that time, we had been back in her home country of Singapore for about 8 months.
- Taking care of my wife.
- Reading the complete works of Charles Dickens.
- Working on my Chinese.
- Putting my ear to her breast every night before I could get myself to sleep.
- Doing a lot of crying.

2. What are 5 Things on your to-do list for today?
- Practice!
- Write two final exams.
- Write a couple of blog posts for next week.
- Keiko!
- Heathen meeting.

3. What are your 5 Favorite Snacks?
- Grandma’s Espresso.  (See recipe tomorrow.)
- Raw Vegetables:  Carrots, Celery, Cabbage, etc.
- Mock Apple Pie.
- Chocolate Syrup.
- Strawberries and Rhubarb sprinkled with brown sugar.

4. What would you do if you were a Millionaire?
- Invest it, then live on 80% of the interest.
- Travel almost constantly.
- Write.
- Compose.
- Open a music school for at-risk kids in St. Louis.

5. Where are 5 places you have lived?
- St. Louis, MO, USA (Heaven).
- Johor Baharu, Malaysia. (HOT, Equatorial Jungle).
- Dhahran, Saudi Arabia. (HOT, Desert).
- Laredo, TX, USA. (HOT, Desert).
- Baton Rouge, LA, USA (HOT, Swamp).

Bonus Link

Just a quick snapshot of my current state of mind:

Beautiful Keiko

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Pigtails

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Halloween Schoolgirl outfit (sans panties…Surprise!)

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A very contented Beau 

P.S.  As you may have guessed, this picture isn’t Keiko.  She’s not quite comfortable with the camera yet, but she assures me that she will be some day. 

Bonus Link  (A  little something for everyone!)